It’s such a rough, almost crude, dwelling in front of me… I stood on the soaked ground in awe. I can’t intelligently explain what happened, but for brief moments, all the Christmases past, present and future melded in praise.

Not wanting to return to reality, I stayed longer in the joy of the morning. Even in this sadness enveloping our whole world, I sensed the peace of the season; it was as if the love of the Father shouted words of eternal meaning. “The most precious moments of prayer consist in letting ourselves be loved by the Lord” says Brennan Manning. ** I stood that morning in the cold dawn, wrapped in love.A few days before receiving this morning’s gift, I had come across the words “radical amazement” used by Abraham Heschel. I have followed that line of thought these past days, and though, he and I share different faiths, I do understand what he meant by living in wonder of everyday.

I smile in the memories of Christmas past when our children were young. When our family was together, laughing, loving, playing. Now, in the pain of brokenness, I rejoice in truth, because the hope of Christmas has not changed.

An entry on a devotional page… when my world was still glorious and bright… I wrote on December 10,^,2011… “Christmas is for Now; it is every day.” And it is, as we live in radical amazement.

Heschel writes… “our goal should be to get up in the morning and look at the world in a way that takes nothing for granted. Everything is phenomenal; everything is incredible. Never treat life casually. To be spiritual is to be amazed.” 

The same Hebrew word translated to be afraid used in the Old Testament Scripture  also means to stand in awe, to be filled with reverence. I think it is amazing the same word can mean “to stand in terror” or “to stand in awe”? Yes, there are times to fear the Lord as we stand in His holiness and greatness, but how beautiful, we can stand in wonder… even in those moments.

“Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of him!
(Psalm 33:8). ESV

What gift of wonder and amazement will I receive this Christmas… this week? Today?

This past Sunday we visited a church where Tom and I had served fifteen years in ministry before we left for international missions. A father wheeled his 43-year old son in and sat two rows in front of me. Tears ran down my cheeks as I have known Sean these many years but had not seen him in a long time. He was not expected to live past eleven years, as he was on oxygen and was tube fed when he was adopted at 21 months.

This beautiful couple lovingly, patiently gifted him with a life, (you should see him eat now!) and this Sunday, smiles covered his face as Christmas praise filled his heart. I was amazingly overjoyed!

Can you imagine you could be surprised and fascinated, be awestruck, be dazzled at least… once a day…

But the greatest wonder of today… by George Bev Shea, 1956.

There’s the wonder of sunset at evening,
The wonder as sunrise I see;
But the wonder of wonders that thrills my soul
Is the wonder that God loves me.

O, the wonder of it all!
The wonder of it all!
Just to think that God loves me.
O, the wonder of it all!
The wonder of it all!
Just to think that God loves me.

There’s the wonder of springtime and harvest,
The sky, the stars, the sun;
But the wonder of wonders that thrills my soul
Is the wonder that’s only begun.

It is difficult, perhaps impossible, to live in radical amazement as I look on the world’s scene, but today, personally, I worship in wonder at the news of the announcement, “The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel… which means God with us (Matthew 1:23).

Manning affirms… “If Jesus is Lord of my life and my Christmas, I am challenged to  submit all the priorities of my personal and professional life to this primary fact.” He adds… If you really accept the mystery of Bethlehem… these glad tidings of great joy, your heart will be filled with the laughter of the Father”.**

And I stand in wonder.

** Reflections for Ragamuffins, 1997